j.’s blog

I have a new shiny shiny! ahhh and it is lovely...  :)


very pleased with my new toy! :)  it does lots of snazzy stuff - including a macro up to 2cm away from stuff - awesomness... and stuff like black & white or sepia shots - LOVE it!

so whilst I had to mourn the loss of my much loved old canon this one rules! :)

So far it has been put to good use, many pictures have been taken of the weekends shenanigans.... an Alice in Wonderland themed party followed by a hen night... shall have to decide what to share....hmmm :)

Also not forgetting the imminent arrival of Chibbi! so more pics shall be aplenty! hee hee :)

oh and of course I shall have to update my gardening pics aswell....ooh how exciting ;)

My camera is broken! *sob*

and I cant even take a picture to show you how broken it is! oh the irony! but if i could it would look something like this...
really NOT a happy camper...   :'(

So here I am again.... the last time I blogged I promised I'd try and maintain this blog a bit more regularly... have I? nope.

*smacks wrist*

Its not that there hasnt been a million and one things I could blog about, in fact theres almost too much - house hunting, moving (always a nightmare) moving in with boyfriend (scarey stuff!), trials and tribulations of many shapes and forms, and yet I just havent managed to find it in myself to set aside the time to write.
Stupid thing is I think about what I want to write far too much instead of just, well doing it.

So here goes, I am going to resurrect this darn blog, be it interesting or not, I am going to write about things that may or may not interest you (hopefully more the former rather than the latter, but hey you never know)

And to start? well I am going to start with a little (but growing!) project I started... growing stuff... yep you heard me, I am growing plants, lots of different plants. Its official, I have gone a bit geeky over the greenstuff.
What started out innocently enough  - " ooh check out these seeds in the sale, they come with a pot and everything!" to me suddenly growing the following (ever increasing) list;

 *ahem*

Potatoes, Onions, Tomatoes, Cayenne Peppers, Lettuce, Rocket, Basil, Oregano, some other peppers of which type I have no idea but they is a growing! , a whole bunch of herbs and maybe a cucumber....

think I may have got a little carried away! 

check these out  :)

  L-R: Rocket, Cayenne Peppers, Tomatoes, herbs (plus Marvel guards) Oregano, Basil and Potatoes

and yes I know the potatoes are bags of mud...but just wait till I do the next update pictures - you know you cant wait :)
 

Well. I have been pondering this blog entry for a little while... since joining vox I have to admit I have sorely underused it.. I have blogs elsewhere but even those have been somewhat neglected....

...why?

I guess I - like many people - write blog entries when they come across something they feel passionate about or they have an experience that causes an emotional high or low.

For instance the catalyst behind starting this post was something that happened to me yesterday, I found out something that perhaps I would have been better not knowing.. my reaction to this newfound knowledge was shock, hurt, anger and then mostly sadness. A friend of mine in trying to find out what caused this upset suggested I write a blog about it.

This made me think.

Whilst I understand the cathartic value of purging yourself via your blog...do I really want to lay open my soul and flog my emotions in public?
After all its bad enough when you rediscover the diaries you kept in your youth and cringe at the things that seemed so important, that now, well now seem trivial

The same friend recently wrote a piece - Think of the Children which questions the impact that all these blogs and social networking sites may have on ours and our children's (!) futures... its a thought provoking piece and one that makes you wonder...

Do I honestly want any children I may have in the future being able to read what I got up to throughout my life in full technicolour? shouldn't there be some mystery?
Would we want our children to know that perhaps we weren't sure? or how relationships were truly started and conducted in brutal detail? Would they ever be able to look at us the same if they knew certain aspects of life preceding them?
Likewise do I want some random person who I have never and will never meet to be able to see my most innermost thoughts and heartbreak?

I for one have never been all that good at sharing how I feel (there are many that would agree with this statement) and  when posed with the thought should I blog about how yesterday made me feel I paused and took stock.
I have brilliant lovely friends and an amazing boyfriend...do I really need to share how I feel publicly?

I think the answer is most likely... no not really.

There are definitely elements of my life I am more than happy to share and will continue to do so (think its about time I started to maintain this blog all said and done) but some things are best left alone.
I would never want to name and shame people or put down in writing hurt and anger, I dont believe this to be positive.

As for what happened yesterday?

I'm going to take it as a life lesson. The experience shocked me a bit and hurt me definitely. But you know what? I have come to the conclusion there is little benefit to addressing the situation directly.

I have always been very bad at removing people from my life that hurt me. I have a terrible habit of not wanting to upset people and do this often to my detriment...and the result? I keep people around me that quite frankly I shouldn't.

Yesterday I threatened to prune my life somewhat... Pruning  have I done so? not really. Should I have? most certainly. Does this make me weak? probably.

But I guess it also makes me...well me. I am who I am and I have to live with that.

Personally I quite like the underground.

I know a lot of people find it all a bit much, all the hustle and bustle, people pushing & shoving, the heat.. but somehow I've always liked it. There's something quite reassuring about being surrounded by people, moving with a purpose in a multitude of directions... something almost cocoon like, especially if you have your ipod (as I commonly do) playing away, almost like a movie soundtrack to your own life..

- although getting into the mindset that people cant see you because you cant hear them is not wise!

Ultimately the tube somehow manages to encapsulate everything that is quintessentially London, love it or loath it.

It also has the power to reaffirm both the good and bad aspects of human nature..

..take today, I had at least two men behave in a 'gentlemanly' manner, allowing me first on the tube... I also saw someone stop and pick up something a lady had dropped and hand it back to her... little things I know, but somehow on a grey - and somewhat painful - Monday morning it made me stop and think. It made me realise there are 'nice' people out there.

Its the little things that count.

This was further reaffirmed for me the other week when I dropped my wallet in a restaurant, not only did I get it back in tact, but the waiter that found it went out of his way to try and contact me to let me know he had it and it was safe...how often does this happen?

So there you go, somehow the tube manages to surprise - and sometimes dumbfound -  me on a daily basis, but more often than not it has the simple power to make me remember why I like London, random as that is.

...although the people who stop dead whilst walking ahead of you still annoy the hell out of me.. grr..